Brutally Honest & Funny Birthday Cards

Funny Birthday Cards That Land Every Time - UK’s Best Banter Cards

You could buy a boring birthday card elsewhere… or send one they won’t forget, ours actually land.
Perfect for roasting your mates, winding up your partner, or shocking your mum just enough to make her laugh - but not enough to get written out of the will. And for those, let’s say, more ‘delicate’ occasions? We've got cards for that too.

Our Best Greeting Card Collections – Funny, Brutally Honest & Rude

Handpicked for legends who love a proper laugh. From Funny Birthday Cards that get a reaction to Brutally Honest roasts that tell it straight, and Rude & NSFW Birthday Cards (strictly 18+ banter). These are our favourites.

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Why Choose Us

  • Free Delivery

    We ship your order as fast as we can – typically the morning after you order! Free delivery on orders over £35.

  • All made by us

    Designed, crafted, and shipped in Birmingham, UK – our legendary greeting cards spark the best moments!

  • Family Run

    We're a small family-run business. Every brutally honest, funny birthday card is made with plenty of heart!

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Our Story

Because lifes too short to be ducking bland...

Our Story Squiggle

We started out just having a bit of a laugh – making cards and little gifts for our friends and family. We wanted to create something honest and fun that people could relate to. At Roast and Roses, we make UK greeting cards that are brutally honest, funny, and sometimes just a bit rude for a laugh – exactly how we like our humour.

We knew people weren’t looking for fancy, over-the-top cards with someone else’s sentimental thoughts inside. They wanted something that felt like it was made just for them—a card that speaks their mind and cuts through the fluff. That’s why we built Roast and Roses – because we get it.

Everything’s handmade by us in Birmingham, UK, and printed on premium 300gsm cardstock (we believe a card should feel as strong as the message inside). We’re here to help you say it like it is, with cards that bring the laughs, the roasts, and a bit of cheek, making celebrations unforgettable for the right reasons. And it all starts with a card, so go on, make someone’s day!

Our Story Star shape 1 Our Story Star shape 2 Our Story Star shape 3 Our Story Star shape 4